I don't want to say that this summer has been interesting, because it has not. It's just been different. Not good different, but not bad different either. Just unlike summers I've had before. This may be the first summer that I've been waiting to go back to school. Mostly because I'll be living in an apartment and I'll finally have my own room, which hasn't been true since I was 3.
I had a lot of plans for this summer, but only a few solidified. They just didn't work out. This summer has been mostly about working and doing nothing, with the occasional something thrown in.
I've been spending a lot of time at church, getting to know some people there. It's kind of nice just to do something different, break from the normal routine.
Doing the same things day in and day out is so monotonous and uninspiring. I crave just the slightest taste of difference, of excitement. I don't want to be trapped in this constant routine every single day. Wake up. Go to work. Come home. Eat. Call people and try to figure out something to do. End up sitting at someone's house doing nothing. Come home. Go to bed. Wake up. Go to work....
I want to do different things. I want to go hiking. I want to go canoing. I want to meet people. I want to spontaneously drive to some distant place and not come home until the next day. I want to go places I've never been before. I want to experience things I haven't done before.
Maybe that will break the apathy, the detachment, the indifference. Maybe that's what I need.
I haven't been myself in so long. I used to get so excited for everything. I was excited just to be alive. And if that sounds corny, I'm sorry, but it's true. Living was an adventure for me. And lately, it seems like it's anything but an adventure. It's like work. It's like something I have to do. Horrible, I know. But with work, you can take a vacation. With life, you cannot.
I don't want a vacation from life though. I want to find things in my life that are invigorating and inspiring. I want to wake up everyday and be excited for all the possibilities that the day could hold. I want to throw off my covers, leap out of bed, and know that the day will not be wasted. I want to live everyday like it's my last day. And I know that I do not want my last day to solely consist of waking up, going to work, and sitting around. I don't want my last day to be so forgettable.
I had a lot of plans for this summer, but only a few solidified. They just didn't work out. This summer has been mostly about working and doing nothing, with the occasional something thrown in.
I've been spending a lot of time at church, getting to know some people there. It's kind of nice just to do something different, break from the normal routine.
Doing the same things day in and day out is so monotonous and uninspiring. I crave just the slightest taste of difference, of excitement. I don't want to be trapped in this constant routine every single day. Wake up. Go to work. Come home. Eat. Call people and try to figure out something to do. End up sitting at someone's house doing nothing. Come home. Go to bed. Wake up. Go to work....
I want to do different things. I want to go hiking. I want to go canoing. I want to meet people. I want to spontaneously drive to some distant place and not come home until the next day. I want to go places I've never been before. I want to experience things I haven't done before.
Maybe that will break the apathy, the detachment, the indifference. Maybe that's what I need.
I haven't been myself in so long. I used to get so excited for everything. I was excited just to be alive. And if that sounds corny, I'm sorry, but it's true. Living was an adventure for me. And lately, it seems like it's anything but an adventure. It's like work. It's like something I have to do. Horrible, I know. But with work, you can take a vacation. With life, you cannot.
I don't want a vacation from life though. I want to find things in my life that are invigorating and inspiring. I want to wake up everyday and be excited for all the possibilities that the day could hold. I want to throw off my covers, leap out of bed, and know that the day will not be wasted. I want to live everyday like it's my last day. And I know that I do not want my last day to solely consist of waking up, going to work, and sitting around. I don't want my last day to be so forgettable.